Breaking The Bondage Of Hatred And Resentment

Breaking The Bondage Of Hatred And Resentment

There are some things we find easy to forgive. When a baby wets on us, we can forgive. When the puppy reduces a magazine to confetti, we can forgive. But when other people who “ought to know better” are involved, we have trouble forgiving. And there is a reason for this.

Forgiving goes against our basic nature. The bible vividly tells us that we are selfish because we choose to be selfish. That is why, forgiving itself is an act of true courage, and it is also an essential part of love. As they say, “if we cannot forgive, we cannot love”.

It’s been said that there are two major tragedies in this life. The first is not accepting God’s forgiveness for the hurt we have caused Him. In an instance, 9/11 quotes the effect of inhuman act of terrorism. As a result, several people died relentlessly on the busy streets of New York. Although it is hard to forgive those who have done such act, but if we acknowledge God’s forgiveness in our soul for all the small and huge mistakes we committed, we can forgive even those who hurt us the most. Facts about 9/11 do not only open our eyes and minds, they also solidify the essence of forgiveness over pride.

The second major tragedy in life is in not forgiving others for the hurt they caused us. If a friend or a brother hurt us, let us set ourselves free from the bondage of grudges. Forgiving a friend is not a sign of weakness, but it’s a sign of acknowledging that humans as we are, we are not perfect.

What is forgiving?

What do we mean when we say, “you are forgiven”? It may be helpful to note first what forgiving is not. Forgiving is not indifference. Saying “let’s just forget it” is not to deal with the problem. It’s ignoring the problem- temporarily.

Forgiving is also not agreeing with the wrong. Some people think saying “I forgive you” really means “what you have done is OK; it wasn’t wrong”. But that is not the case. Forgiving simply means we are releasing ourselves from the chains of not forgiving. That means we hold no claims whatever over the other person. In other words, we free ourselves from the slavery of bitterness and resentment.

We can only forgive one way; by letting go of our pride. It is pride that stands in the way of forgiving. That is why, especially in sensitive matters when we have been hurt to the core, we cannot forgive without acknowledging imperfections and surrendering pride.

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